Crazy Mom's and Clean Houses

So the book I’ve chosen to seek parenting advice from is called The Rules of Parenting by Richard Templar.  I chose this book because 1) it had numerous good reviews on it and 2) this is only one in a series about parenting.  The first chapter of the book emphasizes relaxation.  Templar gives examples of parents who don’t relax (which would be the category I fall under according to the examples given) and then suggests actions relaxed parents take instead.  The example given in this chapter that I seem to completely embody is the parent who is obsessed with cleaning up after their child and gets upset when the kid makes a mess.  Let me give you Templar’s suggestion before I describe in more detail my particular situation.  The remedy to an uptight parent is to relax.  Templar states that “really good parents expect their children to be noisy, messy”.

Now, my side of this story.  I have a personal vendetta against a messy house.  It absolutely drives me crazy to have toys strewn everywhere, shoes all over the living room, and kids with dirty hands running around and touching everything.  And according to Templar, this is something that a parent needs to work on and to let go.  So I tried this new method.  I let my children bring out all of their toys—and I left it alone.  My son decided to try on every pair of shoes he owned (and a few of his sister’s)—and I let them alone.  After playing outside in bubbles, my daughter decided to play with dirt (which basically caused a mud pie on her palms)—and I didn’t run to get a baby wipe right away.  Inside of my head I was ragging a war with myself to stop the compulsive cleaning behavior.  And which side one?  Neither!  Because at this point I am neither relaxed nor do I have a clean house.  I was on the verge of having a breakdown.  Yes, I know—they make medicine for this kind of behavior.  Consequently the relaxation method didn’t last very long.  The result of my first experiment was a crazy mommy and a messy house. 

While I admire those of us parents who can leave things to later, I am not one of them.  I would love to be, and I tried to be.  But it just didn’t work out for me.  I think some of us are just meant to be admired, while the rest of us can be neurotic and good parents at the same time.

  Image taken from

 http://buildingmynestofscotts.blogspot.com/2011/01/does-your-house-always-stay-clean-if-so.html